The Art of Saying No

by: Jaime Almond

As someone who does a lot of social networking, both online and in-person, I receive a lot of requests for meetings.  When I first started my business I said yes to everyone, and I wasted a lot of my time because I didn’t properly qualify what the meeting was going to be about.  As a result, only rarely did these meetings result in any new business.  I had to learn how to say no while making sure I didn’t upset the requester and hurt my reputation.

As your reputation grows, more people will want a little piece of you.  They will want to have coffee, talk on the phone, or chat over email or via social networking sites like Twitter or Facebook.  If you say yes to every request you will not have time to get anything done.

People often are afraid to say no as it risks offending the other person.  Here are some tips on how to say no gracefully while making the other party feel important and respected.

Acknowledge them as soon as possible

Respond to people who contact you as quickly as you can.  Responding in a timely manner lets the other person know you value them.  Make it a habit to promptly reply to emails or voicemails; if you are uncertain about what the other person needs then ask for more information.

Find out what the other party wants from the meeting

It is often not immediately clear why someone wants to meet with you.  Dig a little deeper to find out what it is they are really after; this will help both of you gain clarity with regards to the purpose and expectations of a possible meeting.  If you agree to meet you will both be better prepared.  If you decide the meeting is not right for you then you will be able to provide specific reasons why the meeting is not a good fit.  Engaging and including the other person in the process allows them to feel valued.

Be cautious when offered incentives

Sometimes people will use the incentive of potential referrals to set up a meeting. As tempting as this may be, it is critical to make sure that the other party is a good fit with your needs.  Referrals are often a two-way street: a good referral partner is someone who refers you business and to whom you can refer business.

Find out more about their business who their clients are to see if there is the potential for a two-way relationship.

Find a less time consuming way to interact with them

Sometimes, even after clarification, you may still be unsure about whether the other person is a good fit.  Instead of meeting in person, consider scheduling a 15 minute phone call or video Skype meeting to get a better idea.

Alternatively you could see if there is a group setting, like a networking event, you will both be attending where you can briefly meet to talk.

If it does not fit refer them to someone else

The best way to say no is to follow it up with how you can help them.  If it is possible, refer them to someone who might be a better fit for their needs. If you do not know of a good referral, this could be the perfect opportunity to find a new referral partner.

By following these steps you can say no to people without fear of insulting or offending them.  They will leave feeling good about them selves and about their interaction with you, and also have a clearer idea about your business and the type of fit you are looking for.  In the future they might even refer new business to you.

How have you dealt with saying no?

Posted in: Getting Organized, Managing your Business